I’ve learned in dating that it’s better to be pursued than in pursuit. There’s no better feeling than an attractive stranger flirting with you with genuine interest.
Wouldn’t your life be easier if you didn’t have to worry about being hit on, and competing with other men and women? Wouldn’t you rather choose from great options and not slim pickings? There isn’t a magic pill that will change who you attract. The only thing that can change who you attract is your thoughts. You can attract potential partners when you want, which should be all the time!
Here is a newsflash! Attraction has nothing to do with how you look! (right now you believe it does, so it does.)
Whatever you believe is holding you back will hold you back, but in belief alone. The moment you can believe something new, that belief will begin to be your truth.
Accept now that attraction is based on your ability to attract, not looks or physical beauty.
No matter how hard we try or how healthy we think our self-esteem, men and women still compare themselves to others.
The key to being attractive isn’t about being beautiful, fit and ivy-league intelligent. What attracts others to us is the same force that attracts everything: energy. It might sound strange but your energy and personal vibration is what attracts everything that you’ve come to have in this world. The good dates or the bad ones were all brought to you by your inner energy. That’s great news!
That means when it comes to being attractive you have more control than you think. It all depends on what you’re generating on the inside not the outside, even better news! So how do you begin to expel the type of energy that’s the most attractive to the potential dates you desire? The real answer is complicated but if you can grasp one simple concept, you can start on a journey to change your energy into good energy once and for all.
Let your wall down and raise your positive energy quotient.
Most people don’t realize that they live their lives inside an invisible force field that says, “Don’t notice me.” Too often we’re not in a mindset where we can accept unexpected contact. When people try to enter our space we’re short and impatient. We lower our heads, and evade eye contact all in an effort to stay in our box.
In your own little world…
I know very few people who can put their walls up and down at will. My recommendation is to keep it down. Don’t be afraid to connect with others. Don’t be afraid that you won’t be able to disconnect at will. Don’t keep up a wall trying to avoid others, because you will be successful!
You will miss out on opportunities to meet fantastic people. If you believe in chance or luck good for you but I believe that we are in control of what we attract. Our energy is loud and in command, so why waste it living in a box?
Don’t use the bar, a party or alcohol as the key to opening the door to you. Every moment that you’re single is an opportunity to attract the right person for you. At least interesting potential dates that will help you learn more about yourself.
So how do you start?
Set An Intention
Start by telling yourself: I am open. Believe that you are open to receiving every great thing that is coming your way. Just by telling yourself you’re open to possibilities creates more and more.
Every morning, open your eyes and smile. It’s the little gestures that change our energy. Look around you; appreciate your surroundings and the beauty that’s in your life and smile. Positive energy attracts positive people.
If you wake up everyday dreading what the day will bring, you will continue to attract the same or worse than what is in your life now.
While I normally tell single men and women to give compliments, I’ve realized that many people just don’t know how to or are too afraid. What you can do instead is thank someone for what they’ve done.
Thank your barista for making your order right. Thank someone for holding the door for you.
Thank the bank teller for helping you.
Simply use the phrase, “Thank you for…” and say it often, to everyone.
What you may not realize is all of your bad habits have cultivated the low energy in your love life.
Every time you speak negatively about yourself and/or others your propensity to meet a great partner diminishes. When you say you can’t or when you complain, your energy drops. The people you come across are those operating from the same low energy totem pole as you. In order to change this attraction you have to vibrate on a higher more positive plane. Try it and see for yourself.