Is Your Phone Taking Up Your Attention?
More and more of us are becoming extremely attached to our mobile phones, to the point that it could be starting to threaten our human relationships.
Often, we don’t realize quite how long we spend scrolling up and down or catching up on social media, internet news or simply looking back over old texts until it is too late. Here are six ways to ensure that your mobile phone usage doesn’t damage your relationship with your partner.
Prioritize Your Partner
Put your partner first – when they want to talk to you or show you something, put down your phone and give them your full attention. Take an interest in what they are talking about and spend time discussing it without showing impatience to get back to your phone – whatever you were looking at can wait.
Never have your phone on the table while you are out for dinner with your partner. If you are expecting an important call, or need to be contactable for a child, elderly parent or work commitment, have your phone in your pocket or bag within easy reach – but only answer it if there is a genuine emergency or compelling reason to do so.
Step Back From Social Media
Social media has done wonders in bringing people together and reuniting old friends and contacts like never before.
However, it can be highly damaging if used in the wrong way. Don’t become so obsessed with catching up on your social media contacts activities that you ignore what’s happening right in front of you. Avoid falling into the trap of growing envious of seemingly perfect lives portrayed on social media – people tend to only show the best of their life and hide the areas that are less than ideal. Above all, watch out for social media contact leading you towards a physical or emotional affair.
Remember that it is only showing part of the other person’s reality and you can cause a great deal of heartache and pain if you stray into infidelity, even remotely via contact on social media.
Set Good Examples To Your Children
Children tend to copy what their parents and influential adults around them do and say.
Show them how to conduct a healthy romantic relationship and show interest in and care towards loved ones by not allowing your phone to take over your life One good way of teaching children to keep their mobile phone use under control is to have a family rule that each mobile phone or tablet must stay on a charging lead at all times this stops you or anyone else taking it into the bathroom, to bed or during a meal. Having to physically get up and move towards your phone means that you will be less inclined to ignore your loved ones in favour of mindlessly scrolling by for hours on end.
Be Open And Overt
Many relationships come a cropper due to issues around secrecy over mobile phones.
By being covert and wary when using your phone, you can easily raise suspicion about what you are up to and this can lead to arguments, mistrust and miscommunication. One good idea is to discuss some ground rules over phone usage in advance Talk about past issues so that they are not played out over a mobile phone for the other party to discover. Share passwords and leave your phone around when you are not in the room to show that you are open about what it contains. If your partner asks about names in your contact list or on your social media platforms, tell them who they are and respect your partner’s feelings about unfamiliar names and what they might mean to you.
Put yourself in their position and ask yourself how you would feel if they were being coy about someone you spotted them talking to or texting on their phone. In other words, put your partner and their feelings first if you want your relationship to continue unimpeded Finally, think before you delete content, as this action can arouse suspicion even if you are carrying out some perfectly innocent admin.
Take A Break
Set aside time to go mobile free Leave your phones at home to go out for coffee or lunch, or let the battery run out for an evening free from screens and unnecessary communications with the outside world.
Use the time to connect and rediscover what you first saw in your partner and why you chose them above everyone else to share your life with. Your eyes will thank you for taking a break too, as too much screen time can lead to eye strain and headaches. You may well find that your mood lightens too, as you are freed from being constantly connected to everyone else’s issues, dilemmas and concerns.
There is no doubt that phones can also add to a romantic relationship if used for good reasons Use them to check in with each other throughout the day – sending a short text message, a string of heart emoji’s or even a saucy suggestion for what you might like to do to each other in bed when you get hone can help you stay emotionally connected while you are apart and look forward to seeing each other later on.