Not excited for Valentine’s Day, you’re not alone.
The heart-shaped boxes of chocolate are slowly blossoming in the aisles of grocery stores, and the yards of red ribbon is creeping around the till, strangling the love cards. The chatter of plans for “romantic getaways” and surprise gifts by your excited couple friends buzzes around you like the din of a radio out of tune. You force down the bile. Valentine’s Day is upon us once more.
To millions of people around the world – this is the best news ever! Forget about Christmas and birthdays, this the holiday you have been waiting for. Time to surprise your new boyfriend, childhood sweetheart or hot date with that perfect card or gift. A map of when the stars aligned for you! And who knows what you may get in return? Exciting!
Not for all. As a veteran single on Valentine’s Day I can assure you it sucks. Your spinsterhood is basically scrubbed in your face by the world.
The only way to stop people seeing you sad is to do the unexpected – and pretend you love Valentine’s Day. How fun! What are you two up to? That’s not a big enough gift, get him this!
Really, you just want the whole sordid show to be over.
Anyway, this year I have decided to do Valentine’s Day differently.
Why should I miss out on all the fun? Yet by the same token, why should I celebrate a day that doesn’t include me?
It’s a crunchy conundrum that’s for sure. But there is a way! I have decided to be MY own Valentine. Sure, we should all “love ourselves” every day, and we don’t need to complete ourselves through someone else. We all need to learn to “be alone” – bla bla etc. That can all be done in the mind – for free.
I’m talking about some full-on pampering! This Valentine’s Day, I am taking ME on a date. I might have a tinkle on Tinder or hit up Hinge to bring along a date for company, but this night is about me.
I will treat myself to all those things I agonized over – then decided I couldn’t afford, or didn’t deserve, or “that’s the kind of thing you wait for someone to buy you as a present”. Screw that logic, you only live once, and money is for spending!
Do things for other people. From a selfish perspective, this actually really helps you too! Send some “anonymous admirer” Valentine’s to your single gal pals. (I think we ladies feel the single sting more than our bachelor buddies).
Give A Real Gift From The Heart – Donate Blood!
Most importantly though, be kind to yourself. The world we live in celebrates convention, idolizes success and puts perfect couples on pedestals. Being single is actually amazing! You don’t have to compromise. You are free, independent and you could do anything – anywhere, no strings. You can focus on YOU and build yourself into the dream future you that would make your six-year-old self-proud.
On this day that slavishly fawns upon conventional, couple love. It is the perfect opportunity to send a reminder. Love is not always about two people. Love yourself. Love the world. Love strangers.
Love Valentine’s Day. You deserve it!