For a long time men intuitively knew how to attract women. There was no comparative information, or desensitizing environments, to make them doubt themselves. Women were willing participants and men could gauge what a woman wanted based on traditional factors.
If she was a certain age, she probably wanted to get married. If she had dated previously bad boys, she was probably looking for a nice guy. If she was interested in romance, then dinner and flowers were a sure way to win her over.
Today, while the mystery has waned, the secret to a woman’s heart is becoming less of a secret. Most women are looking for the same characteristics in guys and believe that it’s a reasonable ask. If you poll women across the country they all inherently want the same thing from a guy. And it isn’t just being tall, rich, and Harvard educated.
Most women want a man who is confident in his feelings for her. If you have found it challenging to get women interested, then these five singular steps will make every woman you meet head over heels for you.
First let’s explore the why.
Tips and tricks can seem trivial. Are you certain that you want to trick a woman into liking you? These behaviors however are not tricks. They are practical and reasonable behaviors that have been abandoned because men overtime are have become incapable of connection. Men have become too insecure in their own skin, and the idea of putting their fears aside in order to court a woman hasn’t been something men are willing to do.
So while these actions might seem like techniques, they are really fundamental behaviors that will endear anyone to you, but especially women.
They work because they are rare.
They work because they are how women treat other women.
They work because this is how dating used to be.
Speak Up For Yourself
If you find that you have taken the initiative or want to, to make the plans then don’t let subtle suggestions alter your plans. Speak up for yourself and shut that behavior down.
It’s very common that a woman will have a better suggestion or idea than you when it comes to just about anything. You might notice that when you suggest a place to eat, your date has a better restaurant recommendation. You may be the one navigating and notice that your date pipes in with alternative directions.
At almost every turn of your decision making, women are likely to chime in with an alternate solution, or suggestion. This can seem very innocent and even endearing… at first. It might make you feel that she is as invested in the date as you are. While it might appear innocent, this behavior is incredibly damaging to the male/female dynamic.
There is no need to be rude, because it’s likely just a bad habit. This small habit whittles away at your self-esteem and her respect for you. She is creating a habit of being in charge by being able to shift you ever so slightly away from your plans. Your response, should be – “I appreciate you trying to help, but I got this. Don’t worry.”
Speak up for yourself and show that you are in control.
This will calibrate the power dynamic from the beginning. If you find yourself being swayed by subtle hints, make sure to speak up. Don’t just go along because it seems easy, or to show that you don’t really mind. For every decision you let her make, she will lose respect for you ever so slightly and slowly.
Ask The Tough Questions
Men are supposed to be leaders but when it comes to taking the reins of a courtship men are tragically behind. Women would love to sit back, and be led by a man with intention about his desires for a relationship but too many men are afraid to broach the tough conversations. Too many men are afraid to say what they really want from a woman.
This isn’t about getting deep into the marriage and kids conversation on the first date, this is about asking the uncomfortable questions that you go home and lose sleep over anyway.
• Does she see you as a friend or more?
• Is she attracted to you?
• Does she want a serious relationship?
Think honestly about the questions that keep you up at night and ask them. If you can’t, ask yourself why you are afraid to ask them in the first place. This has nothing to do with anyone but you.
If you are afraid of rejection or you are too scared you’ll lose the woman that you’re dating, then you have bigger concerns than her being into you. Too often men want women to fall for them but they hide critical aspects of themselves. They are masking the part of themselves that women tend to fall in love with. And it’s not the vulnerability of asking tough questions but the fearlessness of asking the questions that matter.
Give Her Options
If you want a woman to feel comfortable around you then give her options. There is no way around the awful feeling of hearing, “No” from the person that you are into. But there are two main reasons women say no in the first place.
1. They don’t have enough information about you or the situation
2. They were only given one other option.
If you want a woman to choose you then give her options. This is a generalization but women enjoy shopping because they like having to the ability to choose. Create an opportunity for her to decide how she wants to spend time with you. Use open phrases such as “We can either,” or “Would you rather”.
The reason you are hearing a NO is because you are only asking yes or no questions. When you provide a woman with options, she is less likely to say no to you. She is more likely to answer thoughtfully, agree to the date.
Often men are very excited to pursue a woman. He calls in the morning. He calls in the evening. He asks about her day, and starts off exhibiting gentleman habits that she likes. Unfortunately, life gets in the way, and he stops showing consistent interest, and even worse he doesn’t follow through with his actions.
It should go without saying that you should do what you say that you going to do. This is simply having integrity. But committing to your word isn’t a one-time event. Being consistent when dating a woman will increase her interest in you. Especially when there was little interest to begin with.
You might object that this has never been you. You are always consistent. Most men, are consistent when they have sensed indicators of interest. They are happy to be the first to text or call to show that they like a woman but the moment she behaves in a way that disrupts his surety of her interest, he begins to play the waiting game.
He begins to wait for her to text him.
Or he waits for her to respond to him and so on.
What men don’t realize is that women intentionally pull back their emotions as a way to test a man’s confidence. If he needs her to blatantly show interest in order to pursue her then she is turned off. Women are looking for men who know what they want, and will go after it, especially when there is a chance that they might not get it.
When you are consistent in the way that you pursue a woman whether it’s a sure thing or not, will get the woman interested in you every time.
Appreciate Her Equity
The men who appreciate women are the men that women like the most. Feeling entitled to a woman’s company, or her attention, is the burden that men place on women every day. It’s stressful to spend your time navigating a world of catcalling , aggressive jerks, and then bring a cheerful attitude to every date.
Men take for granted the fact that they don’t have to battle women on a regular basis and then find a way to love them at the same time. Dealing with an aggressive boss, or male presence, and then showing up on a date with optimism is tricky to navigate. Even if a woman is expected to contribute as much energy into dating as the man, the woman is always going to do more emotional labor than the man.
She puts up with many aspects of his personality that she doesn’t like. This is because women are sexually attracted to men, but in the grand scheme of things don’t like all men.
Thank the woman that you’re dating for showing up. For being who she is. Thank her for giving you a chance, and being in your life. Don’t take for granted that women put a lot of energy into looking good, and showing up for a date. Don’t discount the unwanted attention that women get from men on a regular basis. To date men is part of evolution, and not necessarily her choice.
And to be on a date with a man who feels entitled to her presence is disappointing at best, and annoying at worst. Show appreciation for the woman in your life and she will reward your efforts.