Bargaining is one of the most prominent stages of grief. When it comes to breakups, bargaining simply means trying to get your ex back. In many breakups, this stage of grief lasts a lot longer than usual, simply because getting an ex back is much easier than going through the breakup pain. But is it really the right decision for you? Here are five ways you can tell whether or not you should get your ex back.
1. Are you trying to get your ex back just so you don’t have to go through breakup pain?
Sometimes, the idea of accepting the breakup is more painful than the actual. Just the fear of living alone and not being with your partner can make you want to get back together. But this is not really a good reason to get your ex back. However, if you are at peace with being alone and happy being single and you still want to reconcile, then it could be a good idea to get back together.
2. Do you want to get him/her back just because you don’t want to see them with someone else?
It could be that you want it because of jealousy and possessiveness. Jealousy is not a good reason to make a major life decision and neither is possessiveness. Your ex is not a thing, they are a person and even though you may think that you feel jealous because you love them, it’s actually because you are possessive of them.
3. Did you have a good relationship together?
You can find millions of reasons to get back together; but the one that truly matters is if you had a great relationship with your ex. A great relationship based on trust, honesty and respect is something that should be fought for. And if that’s the case for you, then I hope you do reconcile.
4. Do you have a child together?
If so, then yes it’s definitely worth a try. It’s always good for a child to see their parents together. However, it’s strongly recommended that you don’t end up becoming a doormat just for the sake of being with your ex.
5. Do you two want the same things in life?
What if you want to have children and your ex doesn’t? Are you ready to sacrifice your life goals just to be with someone? Even if your relationship was perfect in every other sense, it’s not worth it to sacrifice your values and life goals just for being with them. If you do, it’d be a huge mistake. In the end, you can never be happy unless you are true to yourself and follow your purpose in life.