What Makes a Woman Want to Kiss You?
There is no real secret to winning over women. Be confident and comfortable with yourself. When you are comfortable in your own skin, it shows. Not only are you calibrated energetically, you’re more aware and able to pay attention to her needs, and thoughtfully address and cater to them.
This is all easier said than done.
There are numerous reasons that men get nervous on a date. We all want someone to like us, validate us, approve and accept us. Men are no exception. It feels good when someone is interested in you physically and you have that instant chemistry. Sometimes you connect with someone and there is pure, undeniable attraction. Other times you’re not sure how your date feels. This post will teach you how to proceed cautiously, and successfully.
Why To Kiss?
Kissing is a great way to connect and bond with your date.
When you kiss someone several things are happening at once. For instance, you are letting your guard down. There is a level of trust that can be assumed when someone is willing to kiss you. Kissing is a sign that the barrier of being strangers has been let down. It can also indicate physical attraction. When you kiss someone your body has a biochemical release signaling bonding, and pleasure. Not only have you emotionally accessed your date, but you are now connecting on a chemical level.
Kissing also indicates closeness. You are physically close and sharing a unique moment together; a moment that has never happened before in history. The first time you kiss someone you are creating a memory which is an important component of any relationship. Especially new ones.
A kiss creates a new shared memory which is key for any new bond.
Why Not to Kiss
Any man who is approaching a kiss as the first step to sex will turn off the woman he is dating. If he needs a kiss to prove that she is interested in him, then he will turn his date off. If you approach kissing as a reward of some kind, then you will make women feel uncomfortable at best, and defiant at worst. They will opt not to kiss just to fuel the insecurity they sense.
Kissing is more than just a reward for showing a woman a good time. Approaching a kiss like a prerequisite is a sure way to make any woman not want to kiss you.
How To Lead Up To A Kiss
Leading up to a kiss on a date is about feeling comfortable and relaxed. Imagine that there is a glowing forcefield around you and your date. These are your insecurities, your trepidations, your prior bad experiences, and your desire to stay safe all in one. A date is meant to deepen or determine a romantic connection but few people enter a date ready to trust. The opportunity for the man lies in his ability to build trust with a woman.
What kind of trust are women looking for, and how can you build it?
Comfort
A woman is genuinely afraid of being harmed by a man. When a woman agrees to a date with a man that she doesn’t know, she is literally putting her life on the line. The first step towards kissing your date is making her comfortable from the moment she arrives. First, a man has to feel comfortable in his own skin.
He has to feel secure enough to pay attention to his date’s needs. This might sound like the man is doing a lot of work, but being confident is an inside job. If you’re filled with nervous, and unstable energy, a woman will not feel like she can trust you. Focus on making your date comfortable by calibrating your energy, paying attention to her energy, and checking in with her from time to time.
Care
Your ability to take care of your date isn’t about what you pay for. You can display authority and chivalry by making your date as comfortable as possible. You can break the ice by putting her at ease with the conversation. You can find a comfortable place to have a seat without needing to ask if she’d like to sit down.
No matter if you’ve planned a five star date, or are grabbing coffee, the moment the man takes charge and creates a comfortable environment for his date, he will start building the trust necessary to move towards a physical connection.
Closeness
Being physically close to a woman helps to lower her guard when done the right way.
A man’s energy, and scent can be very appealing, and build familiarity, even with strangers. Brushing arms, or harmless contact, can put a woman at ease throughout the night. The best way to create this closeness is to first ask if she minds. Throughout the date, before you invade her personal space, just ask. Using the phrase, ‘Do you mind?’, throughout the date gives the woman a choice. She doesn’t feel forced to do anything. Whether you want to try her meal, or sit beside her, or even brush a stray crumb from her cheek, asking permission will put her at ease.
Over the course of the date, you should start to feel the unspoken barrier between you and your date disappear. Ideally, she’ll now be looking for ways to be close to you, and even initiate the physical contact. If this happens then you know for sure that you’ve set the stage for a connection. If you haven’t had any physical contact throughout the date, then asking for a kiss, or leaning in for one, is a quick way to get rejected.
The last way to approach a kiss, is by asking questions.
Checking in with your date is a great way to get a sense of how deep the connection actually is. Asking if she’s comfortable, having a good time, or how she is feeling, will put her at ease. By verbally expressing how she is feeling, she will actually feel that way. If you’ve made it to the end of the night, and are finally ready to kiss her goodbye, you can simply say so.
Again, this is where comfort and confidence takes hold. In whatever moment you feel ready, glance towards your date, and tell her, “I want to kiss you.”
Why is this important?
No one is a mind reader.
Often times we think that we should always do for others in order to be liked but truthfully, when we let others do for us, they tend to like us more. By making a statement, you are open and honest, and you allow your date to do something for you. Wanting to fulfill desires is a natural part of chemistry and connection. If she isn’t into you then she will be turned off. But then you’ll know that you don’t need to pursue that woman any longer. If a woman into you, she’ll want to fulfill your requests.
Making desire statements from the very beginning lets you know where you stand, and will often get you exactly what you want.