Playing hard to get works. I know you don’t want to believe it but take a second and think about it. I’ll wait… No one wants to admit that they play games but when it comes to dating we all play some kind of game.
As much as the term ‘hard to get’ has a bad rap, I know that it is necessary and I want to tell you why.
There is no such thing as a free lunch.
Maybe you’ve heard that saying before or one just like it. Everyone is taught that you can’t get something for nothing. When you meet someone that you like, it’s easy to want to throw yourself at their feet but no one appreciates that which they haven’t worked for.
But in the back of your mind you think why would you treat someone that you like the same way as someone that you don’t like?
Because it works!
That person that you may have blown off once or twice but then went out with is still calling you and pursuing you.
There is a theory in sales that says you go with what works and not with what doesn’t, so if being a little elusive works for the people you don’t like, there is no reason to change for those that you do like.
But many singles make the mistake of changing their game plan because of fear. But oh yes, you don’t want to play games but let me tell you the (dating) truth, people are used to games.
When you don’t play certain games you are looked at as weird. Why? Because the last person that your potential date liked, who blew them off, was playing a game.
They didn’t leave the interaction thinking, ‘This person is playing a game’. Their takeaway was the all familiar, ‘(s)he’s not that into you’.
Game isn’t malicious.
For the most part we are so anxious and nervous about meeting someone that we really like that game is something we revert to, to keep our fears in check. We want to do whatever we think will get the other person to like us. It may seem stupid or irrational but isn’t that just what love is sometimes.
I don’t find anything wrong with game or rules once they’re used for the sole purpose of making a relationship happen. Our intentions are usually to appear more attractive through these tactics anyway, right?
Before you think of throwing game to the waist side, keep in mind that everything we do is the result of motivation. Ask yourself what you’re trying to accomplish.
Can you have good intentions and use game? Yes, just use it wisely.