Unfortunately, we live in a society that places a lot of pressure on our appearance. Although other foreign societies may consider scars to be desirable or at times be self-inflicted, in the majority of cultures this is not the case. The majority of people with scars can feel rejected, embarrassed, isolated, and carry low self-esteem when others react differently to their appearance.
We all have scars on our bodies. Some may be smaller than others, while other scars may have been caused by some form of surgery. Scars have the ability to remind us of our childhood falls or even moments we do not wish to remember. No matter what story lies behind your scars, these scars can affect your sex-life. Many individuals with scars can have body insecurities that prevent them from enjoying sex and being completely vulnerable to their sex partner.
Have you ever felt ashamed of the scars that you hide from your partner? So ashamed of your flawed body that you believe that no one will ever love you because of your scars? Are you guilty of turning off the lights during sex or avoiding being naked in front of your partner? It is normal for someone with scars to have concerns about intimacy and sexuality.
Here are 4 tips that will help you enjoy your sex-life no matter what scars you may have on your body.
Embrace Who You Are
The first step towards embracing yourself is to accept everything about you. That means you have to make peace with your scars. Feeling good about yourself and your body helps you develop a healthy body image.
You do not need validation from your sex partner. Your worth isn’t going to be discovered during sex simply because your partner wants you.
Acknowledging that you have body insecurities will lead you to the path of self-discovery and self-acceptance. Your sex partner is not responsible for fixing your insecurities. You must decide to overcome those insecurities and fully embrace who you are as a person.
Sex Is Not Just For Perfect Bodies
Sex can be enjoyed by anyone with a fully developed human body. No matter if you have a fat body, a thin body, or a scarred body, your body is worthy of enjoying sex. Sex is not just for perfect bodies or society’s standard of beauty. Sexual intercourse was designed to be a normal and natural human function.
You may feel like your body is unworthy of feeling a natural human connection through sex. Although most people aren’t completely confident in their own skin, that doesn’t mean you have to be one of them. Your scars do not have to define you; they can actually be the reason why you are uniquely beautiful.
Do Not Settle For Less
When it comes to relationships, you do not have to settle for a selfish and unloving sex partner.
If you carry insecurities about the scars on your body, the last thing you need is a partner who makes you feel worse about yourself. Never allow your partner to belittle you or place unrealistic expectations upon your appearance. Your sex partner should always be understanding and willing to show unconditional love to you as you learn to embrace your scars.
Scars do not make a person any less worthy of sex, love, or affection. Regardless of the size, shape, or color of your scars, your partner should always remain respectful and supportive. This is what a strong relationship is all about.
It’s OK To Be Vulnerable.
Being vulnerable with your partner is a very scary process. If you are anything like me, you may imagine all the negative scenarios that can take place once you open your heart to someone. It can be hard telling someone you love about your struggles and insecurities, but this might be the step you need to take to determine if your partner truly loves and appreciates you.
When you talk about your body issues, your partner’s response says a lot about their character and your compatibility with them. Your ideal partner should always treat you with kindness, respect, be trustworthy, and understanding. If your partner sees beyond appearances and imperfections and still loves everything about you, they are a keeper. On the other hand, if your partner defines you by your imperfections it is time to reconsider your commitment to the relationship.
You should always feel like you can share topics that matter to you with the person you have sex with. Having sex is already a very vulnerable step you take with your partner it’s how you expose intimate parts of yourself that you would not share with everyone. If you are in control of discussing your physical issues with your partner, you may find that it is liberating when you do open up to them.
The Takeaway
There are times when our imperfections and insecurity can get the best of us, but don’t allow those negative feelings to create division in your relationship. Feeling good about your body and having positive feelings towards sex are necessary when striving for a healthy sexual life.
Ultimately, you must decide between holding on to your fears of having an imperfect body with scars, or simply loving yourself and enjoying your sex-life with your partner.