The question I’m always asked is: How can a man feel comfortable talking to women?
I’m sure women are sometimes just as equally nervous talking to men but since women don’t solicit my opinion on that topic I’m leaving them out of this post. There is inner game and there is outer game. I possess inner game because I can walk into a room, decide what man I want to talk to me and within the time I’m there that man will approach.
Even if I have to conveniently walk past him once or twice, I feel absolutely confident that he will talk to me. How do I know this? Unlike women, men have a need to meet people. They are more likely to seek social validation. In a bar or club men are far more invested in meeting someone new than women are. Women will sit in corners, buy their own drinks and remain occupied with their friends the entire night.
I don’t know why this is but I know it exists and I exploit it. The way that I built my inner game, which is a combination of attraction qualities and confidence, is with a strong inner dialogue. It may not have been the answer you were looking for but consider the following.
Every human being is susceptible to influence. Humans possess the ability to plant a seed of thought into another human being with suggestion. We naturally and willingly enter others’ minds and let others enter our own. We create impressions. Inner game transfers your thoughts about yourself to another person, so whatever you think they will think. This is why it is imperative that you create a positive inner dialogue.
When single people, men and women, have an inner voice that says, “I know I don’t look good. I am not attractive. I am not as interesting or cool as the person I desire.” What do they expect potential dates to think?
Thoughts such as, “Women intimidate me. I fear being rejected,” infiltrate your body language, your speech and create the message “I’m at your mercy”. And yes, men you are. Like a puppy begging its owner for attention, is how I’ve seen men approach women. With the attitude of ‘please validate me’.
Stop reading if you disagree.
My inner dialogue says, “I like who I am. I validate myself. I am happy. I accept myself. I don’t need your circus.” When I meet men I don’t ask for their opinion of me, I give it to them. The next time you meet a woman make sure to do the same.