How do you get into a relationship? This is a popular question for me and one that I love to answer. I teeter sometimes between the concept of dating is hard, and dating is simple. Maybe it’s both. Although some people believe it’s by luck or chance, getting into a relationship is a combination of key elements. And desire.
The first step of really getting into a relationship is wanting one. Next, there are proven steps that will get you into a relationship with anyone you come in contact with. Sure, there are always exceptions. Life is full of outliers, but the truth is when you’re good, the odds get better and your average goes up.
Once you learn how to date and get really at building attraction the chances of you getting into a relationship increase exponentially. If you’re dating regularly but you’re having a hard time getting those dates to turn into a relationship you might want to consider the steps below. We can be very good at blocking the very love they claim to want. So the reason your dates aren’t progressing might surprise you, and this is what you should do about it.
Attachment is the number one reason we get into relationships. Physical, chemical and emotional bonds are made with the people we date when they open up to us and we do the same. Opening up to your date doesn’t mean telling them how you felt about your parent’s divorce although it could. Opening up in a real way means letting yourself be in the moment and have a really great time in the company of your date.
That might come as a surprise to you but attachment is made in the moment. It’s not made after date two or four, it is made in the very second you touch hands, lock hands, and oxytocin is released from the brain.
This attachment is what makes your date think of you when you’re not around. This attachment makes you date want to impress and feel as if they need your approval. By creating an attachment to you, the part of the brain that misses you is triggered. This then leads to desire.
Add More Value
When a date fails to turn into more dates then eventually a relationship it’s likely one person didn’t see the value in other. What makes us valuable to others is what we add to their lives. What do they gain by having us as a partner? What do we bring to the table? Showing your value first starts with knowing what your value is. What will you bring to the relationship? Why would anyone want to date you? What is it that you offer?
Value proposition is the key, after attachment, to building a relationship. If you can’t show a potential partner what you will bring into their life then they won’t be eager to commit to you.
Fill A Void
Getting into a relationship isn’t just about having a person to do things with its about finding the right partner who can fill a void. Human beings have a void in their hearts where a partner can fit perfectly. This void is the part in all of us that needs to be accepted. We can only feel accepted however by those we feel our like us in some way. If your date thinks you’re too different then you will never fill their void or need for full self-expression. These voids are essentially the catalyst we need to be out true selves.
You can fill the void by being a safe place where potential partners can be themselves. This is incredibly difficult because most singles have an idea of who they want their date to be, its called expectations. These expectations prevent people from being themselves. It obstructs the very things they are looking for.
So why don’t more people, who truly want relationships, build connections, add value and fill a void for their partners? They don’t know how. We are too busy and too excited by what our potential dates can be for us that we forget that we need to create the chemistry and connection first. I created this course for anyone ready to be irresistible.
Take a step back on your next date and observe if you are being a good partner. Are you being the kind of partner you would want to be with. If yes, then you should find love sooner than later.